SUNDAY BLOG: SAM, RUBY AND BRIDIE – LOCAL HEROES

February 17, 2019 annehailes Anne Hailes Today 2867

Shock Horror

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What a shock to hear that FLY BMI   has gone into administration with all flights cancelled.  This is  serious for travellers flying to 25 destinations, including City of Derry,  and many must be local people  coming and going to the continent.  Advice is to contact travel agents, insurance or credit card companies, with what success I wonder?   The reason apparently – spikes in fuel and carbon costs and that old chestnut – uncertainty over Brexit.  This is a tragedy for so many, plans now up in the air and a hope that something can be retrieved as soon as possible.  And what of people away on holiday or on business trapped somewhere in Europe unable to get home.  There will be plenty of horror stories today and sad plans cancelled. At first a lot of people thought Flybe was going under which would have been a blow for City Airport and for those of us who use this airline but so far so good although they have had a ‘cash injection’ which is never good news.    We can ill afford another organisation pulling out, our isolation is getting frightening.

Taking A Lead

Well done to the delightful young people at the City Hall on Friday for standing up to the rest of us and telling their elders to get a grip and recognise the  dangers our climate is facing.

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TREES

PigeonToed or Hen Toed – It’s Becoming the new Fashion

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You’d think someone would tell Alesha Dixon not to stand hen toed, it seems to be the stance young thin women adopt for some reason – so inelegant.  It seems to be the fashion these days, just watch this leggy ladies on television and you’ll see what I mean.

 

 

Goodbye To A Wonderful Man Of The Theatre

Sam and Joan.web_

 

FOUR years ago Michael Cameron drafted a script which told the story of Ruby Murray.

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Without realising Sam McCready’s credentials, he emailed his work asking “What do you think?”
“Then I looked Sam up and realised what an amazing man of the theatre he was. I almost hoped the email would go astray.”  The two became firm friends and Sam liked the script but advised Michael: “Make it a monologue.”
He did and in an emotional tribute at the end of Wednesday’s opening night of Ruby at the Lyric Theatre, Michael honoured Sam’s memory and expressed his thanks. He invited us in the timely fashion to stand and applaud this special man.
Michael Cameron
Michael Cameron
The news we’d been dreading, the death of Sam McCready, came last Monday morning. It has saddened so many people because this man touched so many lives – a teacher, an artist, a man steeped in theatre, directing and acting.
Sometimes it’s hard to encapsulate one person’s true spirit and this is a case in point. Even in death Sam is there with his joy of achieving, no matter how small the challenge and I’m quite sure he approved of Ruby and the sensitive direction by Richard Orr and the amazing performance of Libby Smyth.
Now Sam has succumbed to the greatest challenge of all and he bore his illness with dignity.
Libby Smyth with Richard Orr after the performance of Ruby in the Lyric Theatre
Libby Smyth with Richard Orr after the performance of Ruby in the Lyric Theatre

 

A few weeks ago he was delighted he’d finished another of his one-man shows to go alongside Percy French and Charles Dickens, and his paintings were ready for exhibition in the ArtisAnn Gallery Belfast.
Sam with his close friend artist Neil Shawcross with Neil's painting of Sam as Dickens.
Sam with his close friend artist Neil Shawcross with Neil’s painting of Sam as Dickens.
The hundreds of Facebook messages of good wishes for a speedy recovery were always answered with positivity, hoping he’d get on top of his breathing difficulties, but it became too much, the replies ceasing after one posting where, looking frail, he spoke to us.
With a nightingale singing in the background he talked of his love of Keats and thanked us all for sharing thoughts and prayers that he said entered his very heart and brought him comfort. “Thank you for sharing your love.”
A neighbour in Baltimore, USA, where he lived, spoke of the times she happened along the Dickeyville path: “To stumble upon him rehearsing one play or another in his garden – his beautiful, beautiful, rose-filled, fragrant garden.”
I first met Sam when I was 15. I was a chorus girl in the Mikado and when Sam as KoKo sang the tragic ‘Tit Willow’ I lost my heart to him.  Throughout his life he had a great fondness for Gilbert and Sullivan.
Years later we sat in the Linen Hall Library – Sam, his wife Joan and me – and our conversation ranged from topic to topic, always flavoured with the joy of the arts.
Although they’d been married over 50 years, they were like young lovers. “We were both students at Stranmillis when I first saw Sam playing KoKo in the Opera House. I was excited by his voice, his enthusiasm and his professionalism.” I knew what she meant.  “Not long afterwards at Stranmillis College, I saw this little figure and I thought, I know you. You’re the Lord High Executioner.”
He was immediately on her list and so began a golden circle of events which brought them together and kept them together. He added somewhat wistfully: “I thought she was absolutely beautiful but could I ever attain this goddess?”
I wondered if they ever quarrelled. They consulted each other: the answer was no, quibble sometimes, but never quarrel.
“That’s not to say we don’t have strong and differing opinions of lots of things,” Sam said.
“I think the best way to sum it up is that here are two individuals, me and Joan, and then there’s a third person in our lives called ‘Sam ’n Joan’ and that’s the person we are most of the time.”
Sam McCready died aged 82 on Sunday in the United States a man of performance and letters.    I send my love to Joan and the family.
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 Fortunate Children To Have A Caring Mum Like Bridie
Bridie McLean and jo
Bridie McLean and Jo Irvine

You just know Bridie McLean is special when you arrive at her front door, there she is arms out in greeting and a big hug of welcome.  It was as if we’d known each other for ever but last week was our first meeting for a chat about being a foster carer and the special event happening later this week. 

Excitement was building to the 2019 National Care Day on Friday 15th February, with events throughout Norther Ireland as we are all encouraged to understand more about children and young people who are or have been cared for by foster carers or other family members and those who live in children’s homes. 

The week ended with a spectacular show in the Waterfront Hall organised by Voice of Young People In Care (VOYPIC);  “The Greatest Show’ was introduced and performed by young people showing joy and positivity rather than any negativity about fostering and general ignorance surrounding care homes. 

It came as a surprise to me that on average 16 young people enter the care system here every week usually through no fault of their own, sadly there aren’t enough private homes for foster children but with the good news slowly filtering through to the pubic hopefully that will change.  

When it comes to Bridie’s family, she told me that they’ll all be there on Friday to enjoy the show especially as 15 year old Arron was due to  sing with his brother Gerard 17 cheering him on and a proud foster mum who delights in these boys who have brought great pleasure since they arrived with her over 10 years ago.   

Although not always easy she has a remarkable record having sheltered 20 children in need of love and understanding from a four day old baby to a seventeen year old, at the same time as bringing up her own four children, sadly her first born, John Martin, died when he was only eight. 

As we sat and talked in her comfy home off the Springfield Road, Jo Irvine from VOYPIC joined us to explained how her charity works with the children alongside fostering agencies who deal directly with the foster carer but in fact all cooperate together and certainly in this case it works perfectly.  

Voypac is a charity that reviews the children’s situation promoting their rights and improving their lives, they run group activities, take them to met politicians, breakfast with the Lord Mayor, all designed to improve self esteem and build confidence.  They go away for weekends where the aim is to concentrate on personal development.  The service wraps around the young people and literally makes sure their voices are heard.

Achieving Their Dreams

Chief Executive of VOYPIC Vivian McConvey said, “Our alliance simply wants a world where these children and all young people can thrive and achieve their dreams so that they have a future that is fulfilled and of which they are proud.” 

What are the assets needed to be a good carer?  Apart from fulfilling required criteria, the parents must be able to recognise the strengths and weaknesses in a children entrusted to them and importantly not to judge them. Respect on both sides is vital and discipline can be achieved with a look and a stern talking to, it’s all about building bridges that prepare them for life.

Although well used to fostering, Bridie explained that the call can come quite suddenly.

“I was feeling a bit down one Friday morning and I made a prayer to St. Martha for strength and an hour later the phone rang.  Could I take a little boy for the weekend.  Absolutely yes.  I began to prepare when shortly after that the phone rang again, could I take his brother as well – just for the weekend.  I jumped up and began to rearrange furniture getting two beds into one bedroom so the boys would be beside each other and not be afraid until they settled down and it was only for the weekend!”

 

The Two Boys Just After They Arrived
The Two Boys Just After They Arrived

That was 12 years ago.  

The boys are both attending St. Gerard’s special school which caters for children aged three to nineteen,  Arron is now 15 and Gerard is 17 and although they live with Bridie they are still close to their own family although their mum died recently.  They spend time with their father, playing football or enjoy days together, this closeness of the two families is something Bridie has worked hard to facilitate.  She rises at 6.30 a.m. and the routine begins, washing, dressing, breakfast, school bags then the bus arrives at 8.15 and the boys go off to St. Gerard’s.  She says it’s a joy to get up in the morning with her two boys. “My angels,” she calls them.  ‘I’m always asked how do you manage when you have to give them back.  Certainly it can be heart breaking and I’ve often been very sad but in most cases we don’t lose touch and there’s a bond there which can’t be broken.”

Bridie explains that she was the oldest of six so grew up looking after family.  “When my Dad died I stepped into his shoes so I’m used to making decisions and looking after everyone.  I’m always at the end of the phone to sort things out because life is not rosie for everybody and we are all here to help each other.”

This warm and cosy woman has an open door policy and people come and go, there’s always chat and laughter just the right atmosphere for children and adults alike.    A salary covers essentials but to Bridie fostering isn’t a job, there isn’t any difference between her foster children and her own family, even her grandchildren are all part of one big happy unit each drawing on the other, each supporting the other and the big word is love.  As Jo says, this woman has a big massive heart, she’s a West Belfast mummy, baking and cooking and lifting and laying with time and room in her heart for everyone.  

 solitude

Futility of Words?  What would we do without them.  May ours all be well chosen and positive.  Have a good week.

2 Comments

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