SUNDAY BLOG: Good Things Happen Even In Our State of Chaos

The world in a state of chaos - a few prayers and some positive thinking required.
Heifer Sutherland plays the part of Amrican President Tom Kirkman in Designated Survivor.
Heifer Sutherland plays the part of Amrican President Tom Kirkman in Designated Survivor.
The world in a state of chaos - a few prayers and some positive thinking required.
The world in a state of chaos – a few prayers and some positive thinking required.

Finished watching Designated Survivor last night, the story of Tom Kirkman, played by Keifer Sutherland, a lowly American politician who was chosen to fill in the post of President in the most unlikely event of Capital Hill and all the inmates being wiped out in a catastrophe. Well, it happened in a huge terrorist attack and this poor man was catapulted into the presidency. Good series and apposite at this time to see just what a new man in the White House has to face – and it’s not easy. Friday and there after will be interesting days.

Meryl Street at the Golden Globes
Meryl Street at the Golden Globes

Meryl Streep certainly ruffled Donald Trump’s feather with her speech at the Golden Globes in Hollywood. Holding her life time achievement award she criticised him for mocking a disabled reporter. Without naming the president elect, she gave him a real scorching. He in turn tweeted that she was one of the ‘most over-rated actresses in Hollywood’ and anyway, he said, he never mocked a disabled reporter. He threw all his toys out of the pram and you could visualise his face red and screwed up with rage. At 67 years of age, Streep’s sage logic is worth listening to although a bit harsh.

meryl sleep

 

“I no longer have patience for certain things, not because I’ve become arrogant, but simply because I reached a point in my life where I do not want to waste more time with what displeases me or hurts me.  I have no patience for cynicism, excessive criticism and demands of any nature.  I lost the will to please those who do not like me, to love those who do not love me and to smile at those who do not want to smile at me.

I no long spend a single minute on those who life or want to manipulate.  I decided not to coexist anymore with pretence, hyprocrisy, dishonestly and cheap praise.  I do not tolerate selective erudition nor academic arrogance.  I do not adjust either to popular gossiping.  I hate conflict and comparisons.  I believe in a world of opposites and that’s why I avoid people with rigid and inflexible personalities.  In friendship I dislike the lack of loyalty and betrayal.  I do not get along with those who do not know how to give a compliment or a word of encouragement.  Exaggerations bore me and I have difficulty accepting those who do not like animals.  And on top of everything I have no patience for anyone who does not deserve my patience.”

Meryl Street.

So there!  At the awards in Hollywood she said, ”’Disrespect invites disrespect, violence incites violence. When the powerful use their position to bully others we all lose.’
The Hollywood Foreign Press Association are a savvy bunch who honoured the actress with the Cecil B. DeMille Award for outstanding contributions to the world of entertainment.

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Millennium Generation

I was very struck by a Facebook entry over New Year, a video of motivational speaker Simon Sinek giving a talk about teenagers and it was fascinating and alarming. Very much a generalisation but a few big grains of truth. Sinek is well-known through Technology Entertainment Design conferences (TEDx) and the author of books on leadership and management.

Sink
Simon Sinek

His theory concerns the ‘Millennium Generation’. Maybe because of the Troubles here they have been lifted and laid, they have been indulged. In general, he maintains, these youngsters feel they are entitled to the good life, children have been told by teachers and parents that, if they want something enough they will get it. Of course, they mean if you have focus and are prepared to work you’ve a good chance of achieving. Those who do have focus want to work with a purpose, work with impact want instant results. But, he adds, for some reason too many are not happy because there’s at least one missing piece. He then breaks this theory down to four suspect elements – parenting, environment, impatience and technology.

Take failed parenting strategies.
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Simon Sinek believes that self image is shattered and that an entire generation, the Millennium Generation, is growing up with lower self esteem than other generations.

Jewel Samad/Agence France-Presse — Getty Images
Jewel Samad/Agence France-Presse — Getty Images
The world in a state of chaos - a few prayers and some positive thinking required.
The world in a state of chaos – a few prayers and some positive thinking required.

Then he tackles technology.
Instagram, tweeting, e-mail, Facebook and the rest. You can hide behind this method of communications, you can tell people life is great even when it’s not, when you feel down and unloved, send out lots of messages saying ‘Hi How You Doing’ and guess what, you’ll get lots of people responding and asking how you are and immediately you feel good because someone cares. And, through no fault of their own, these young people are allowed to inhabit a world of unreality.
Over engaging with the excitement of social media he believes is dangerous because a chemical is released in the body, dopamine, and it gives a high when you get a text and feel good that someone wants to talk to you, apparently this chemical also promotes the feel good effect of smoking, taking alcohol, gambling and sex. It’s complex, check it out with an expert.
There are age restrictions on drinking, gambling and smoking but none on social media and so, according to this thesis, an entire generation is addicted to social media, someone un-friends you and it traumatic, don’t get a message for a couple of hours – panic, leave your mobile at home – lost.
He acknowledges that adolescence is a difficult time, moving from the approval of parents to wanting the approval of friends, moving into the ‘wider tribe’ where texting is the way to communicate. Even with older people there’s apparently proof that depression can be the result of long term social media use – nothing wrong with social media unless it becomes unbalanced. If you’re sitting in a meeting or at a meal and have your phone on the table beside you, you are sending out the message that you’re not fully concentrating on what’s going on and implying ‘you people aren’t that important to me’. According to Sinek you are addicted. If you start using your phone before you say hello to anyone in the morning, you are addicted. If the majority of your conversations are conducted by Smart Phone, or E-mail or iPad rather than in person, if you are turning to a device to communicate means you’re not developing mechanisms to cope with stress or making long term and valuable relationships.
Now add a sense of impatience.
Growing up in an age of instant gratification doesn’t only apply to adolescents. Isn’t it a fact that if any one of us wants to buy something immediately it’s simple to go on Amazon or e-bay and it’s delivered the next day? Want to see the latest film, no need to go to the picture house with friends, just download it. Want a book to read, who needs a library when you have a Kindle, want to arrange a financial transaction you don’t need a bank anymore, just go to online banking or swipe your card. No social interaction.
Isn’t it interesting that the Children’s Commissioner is now taking an interest in young people and the Internet and that some big firms in the United States are talking about limiting personal mobile phone use during working hours, schools are banning them and getting better results in exams and theatres are way ahead, although a lot of punters forget to turn them off!
Question. Could you go out for dinner and leave your phone at home? Not easy. Could you leave your mobile downstairs at night? Could you do without it in a meeting? Instead of a group of people sitting looking down at their screens you might actually talk to colleagues, get to know them, hear what their life is all about, make lasting friendships. Are you strong enough to resist or remove the temptation? Am I?
Young people need leadership, encouragement to build skill sets, learn patience and spend time on things that matter like talking, laughing, loving and friendship – without a piece of technology coming between.

Purr-fect

cat

Late Bishop Edward Daly had a beloved cat called Tom and I met this four footed personality some  years ago when I was taking tea with the Bishop in Derry.
Just as I  imagined, Edward Daly worked surrounded by books; many religious, one shelf devoted entirely to Bibles of all sorts, but also books on theatre, travel, sport – subjects of great variety reflecting his wide interest in life in general. Betty, his is loyal housekeeper had just brought tea and biscuits into his study when a large marmalade cat suddenly stalked in, looked me up and down with some distain then  left in a hurry but despite this I felt most welcome!
Tom was the Bishop’s  friend for over 15 years until his death in 2016 when  the cat left home.  However, Coleraine man Dave Graham came across him in an animal shelter.  He told BBC he’d been trying to find a home for a new kitten when he met Tom.
“I asked who his owner was and they told me that Bishop Edward Daly’s housekeeper had brought him in, I was shocked! They’d  an urgent request to find this guy a home, he’s 16 years old and he’s deaf.”

Tom
Tom

Apparently Tom had literally landed in Bishop Daly’s lap many years ago after a hospital appointment, the cat just appeared made himself at home and stayed and was considered a lucky charm. Dave didn’t think twice and now  that charming cat again has a warm happy home.

The world in a state of chaos - a few prayers and some positive thinking required.
The world in a state of chaos – a few prayers and some positive thinking required.

 

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